Tag Archive: Squish

Case Updates: Squirm & Lil Bit

I just realized that I have NEVER told y’all about Lil Bit – like, at all! That’s terrible!! So I’ll get to him in a minute – but the update on Squirm will be much quicker, so I’ll start there:

NOTHING.IS.HAPPENING. As you already know, Previous Foster Mom (PFM) appealed our selection as his adoptive family. She also made some other legal maneuvers that can’t be fully addressed until her appeal is heard and ruled on. The appeal hearing was scheduled for next Tuesday. Yesterday I was told that her attorney requested a continuance…

We don’t have a new date yet, but I was told today it will probably be in August. In case you forgot – Squirm became available for adoption on 1.16.14. So we will have his post-termination Permanency Hearing before this appeal is heard – and AFTER THAT, we have to deal with the other junk….

So, yeah. My child has been a legal orphan for 5 months, and there doesn’t seem to be any urgency to remedy that situation. The one upshot is that he doesn’t know that. He’s 2, so none of this makes any difference to him. That’s what I’m holding onto….

Lil Bit is just awesome. He is such a happy baby and he has the greatest smile. His laugh is completely delightful. In fact, my only complaint about Lil Bit is that he won’t laugh for me. 🙁 SuperDad can get him to laugh, and he will laugh HYSTERICALLY for Squish. But I can’t get so much as a chuckle. However, he talks to me. Lil Bit and I have looooong conversations. And he sings to me. He occasionally will coo a little at SuperDad, but I’m the only one he sings to. And I’m the only one he has conversations with (and not just because I’m the only person that will have long conversations with a 6-month-old).

He was born with torticollis, which basically means that his neck, jaw and shoulder muscles were really tight and he constantly looked to his right. Which led to a serious flat part on the back of his head. Which led to the need for a cranial band (more commonly known as a helmet). He got fitted last week, and let me just tell you, he is TOTALLY rocking that helmet! We found a company called Bling Your Band that designs decals for cranial bands. We ordered a custom kit that will make his helmet look like a Pittsburgh Penguins hockey helmet. As soon as everything comes in, I’ll post pictures of the application process and a review of the company (spoiler alert: I’ve already been really impressed with the company). Lil Bit has also had physical therapy 3 days a week for the last couple of months to resolve the torticollis. He has shown MASSIVE improvement, and we’re expecting the PT to be discontinued in the next few weeks.

His Case: Meh. The case plan is expedited TPR. But…. nothing’s ever easy, right? We can’t actually move forward until the birth father is identified…. I feel like I’m on an episode of Groundhog Day meets The Maury Povich Show – YOU are not the father… YOU are not the father…. I asked in court today how long this is going to be drawn out – why can’t we test all the possibilities right away instead of testing one, learning he’s not the father, going to court, asking for the next name, test the next guy, see if he’s the father before locating the next guy….. Supposedly they’re now going to try to track down all the potentials and get them tested before we go back to court in August (!), so hopefully we’ll move forward at that point. (I hope you’ll understand if I don’t hold my breath….)

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Hint:
It has recently come to my attention that not all of my readers can easily tell when I’m being sarcastic. That is truly unfortunate, so finding a solution was imperative. ^Obviously, the easiest answer is to assume that if something can be read with sarcasm, it should be;^; but that’s not really workable, I guess. After reviewing several options for a “sarcasm font”, I’ve come up up with my own system. Whenever you see italics inside carrots (^snark^), that is my “sarcasm font”.

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Merry Christmas!

The baby has arrived!! He is gorgeous!!!! He is 4 weeks old, but he was 5 weeks premature, so his adjusted age is -1 week 🙂 He is just a tiny little bit of a thing, and so, he will henceforth be known as Lil Bit.

He looks so much like Squirm that my heart melted immediately. He even already has some of Squirm’s facial expressions.

The Twins are doing really well with our newest addition. Squirm is  kind of oblivious and Squish is ENCHANTED. They both say Hi Baby and Squish gives him hugs – and then tries to stick his finger in Lil Bit’s ear.

Oh! And the final TPR order was signed for Squirm, so we’ve started the clock on his 30-day appeal period!!

It’s a Very Merry Christmas for our Traveling Circus!!

N.A.A.M. Blog Tour: Where did all these boys come from??? (Part 1: Squish)

In January, just before Squish was reunified with his birth father, I told our agency, “No more boys. Only girls. Girls are more fun and boys’ clothes are boring.”

No more boys.

In honor of National Adoption Awareness Month, I’m participating in an Adoption Blog Tour (AND GIVEAWAY!). Since we’re hoping to finalize a couple of adoptions in the next few months, I decided to write about the sequence of far-too-many-to-be-coincidence events that aligned and blessed us with two happy, boisterous, affectionate, spirited, funny, exasperating beautiful boys.

Because I’m incapable of making a long any story short, this will be a multipart fairy tale. Hang in there, because I’m pretty sure we all live happily ever after. Without further ado, here’s

How We Got Squish-ed
  • When we were initially licensed, even though we were adamant that 2 was our limit, our licensing coordinator licensed us for 3 beds, “just in case”.
  • In May 2012, we got talked into taking a sibling group of 2. This brought us to capacity and meant that when Squirm initially came into care, we didn’t get that call.
    • If we had taken Squirm when he first came into care, we couldn’t have taken Squish in July.
    • The sibling set was moved in July 2012, and I asked my agency to find us another baby ASAP. Meanwhile, AS A FAVOR TO MY AGENCY, we agreed to provide respite for two boys.

On July 20th, I got a call about a newborn baby girl just being released from the hospital – without even checking with SuperDad, I said we’d take her and happily began prepping for the new addition. Before I even finished making up the bassinet, my agency called back and said I couldn’t have her because Mr. Stork, the placement specialist at CPC wouldn’t give me an over-cap, even though I was at capacity only because of the respite. To put it mildly, I was furious. My agency relayed how unhappy I was, and Mr. Stork promised that the very next infant that came into care was mine. Sure. Whatever.

  • That baby girl actually never came into care. If Mr. Stork hadn’t denied my over-cap that evening, I probably wouldn’t have been the 1st call for Squish – I definitely wouldn’t have been the only call.
  • Less than a week later, the phone rang at 11 pm. A 4-month-old boy was coming into care and even though I was still doing respite, my over-cap was already approved. The mom had several kids already in care with paternal relatives. This little guy had a different unknown father. Which meant that odds were very good that this case would go to adoption. Mr. Stork kept his promise & Squish landed at 1am.
  • In a major plot-twist, Squish’s birth father was identified and Squish went to live with him in January 2013.

This is when I told my agency “No more boys.”

    • In yet another plot-twist, Squish’s birth father changed his mind, and Squish came back into care. Normally, he would automatically come back to us to ensure as much continuity as possible.

But by then we had Lady Bug and Squirm – and the state says that foster parents can’t have more than 2 children under 2. There’s a waiver, but the state had gotten really tetchy about  waivers and it definitely wasn’t a sure-thing. Mr. Stork was contacted by Squish’s CM, our agency, Mother Goose (as my mentor), and Rainbow Brite, the Foster Care Liaison. Everyone assured Mr. Stork that SuperDad and I could handle 3 infants and that this was the best option for Squish. Mr. Stork agreed, and Squish came home!

Now check out Where Squirms Come From to see how we wound up with the second of our sweet boys.

* if you’re unfamiliar with any terminology, it might be helpful to check out my primer on foster care lingo.


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Please check out the other foster/adoptive parents who have contributed to the National Adoption Awareness Month Blog Tour by clicking the photo above!